Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Gunning for the Game

NBC has a new reality show: Stars for Stripes.  The idea is that some C level celebrities (Dean Cain, Picaboo Street, Todd Palin, etc) will complete in military style competitions, complete with trainers who co-compete with them.  I love the wonderful symmetry between NBC as a crappy network and the Democrats as a crappy party both relying on a retired general, Wesley Clark, who is universally reviled among folks in the US military.

But the point of this post is to suggest potential games for the competition.  The articles I have seen mention target shooting and, I think, rappelling out of helicopters.  From my time in the Pentagon and then as an observer via twitter and various interactions/interviews over the past decade, I have a few suggestions:

  1. Powerpoint Ranger: The contestants must take a concept or plan and devise the most complex set of slides.  Extra points for flying graphics that swoop across the screen.
  2. Acronym Alphabet: Competitors must be able to list acronyms from A to Z--the one that can keep going the longest wins.
  3. Moving Machines: The first contestant to move their belongings from one base to another to a third without losing more than 10% of their belongings wins.
  4. PC DFAC: During the competition, the contestants must eat only at military dining facilities and must avoid all pork products.  Anyone who eats a pork product is out.  Also known as the Green Zone Challenge.
  5. Service Rivalry: Each contest will be associated with a service and within that service a distinct branch (Surface vs Sub, Armor vs Infantry vs. Arty; Pilot vs Missileer, etc).  Contestants will compete to buy the biggest, most expensive and least useful pieces of equipment.  Winner is the one that gets the largest percentage of the budget.
  6. Word-Smithing: Each contestant will be given a document and will have to change all of the nouns and verbs to their synonyms, such as small dog to puppy. 
  7. Hooah?  Another mindgame: contestants will compete to see who can figure out the meaning of a "hooah" given the context of a particular situation.
  8. Navy Fashion: Contestants who dresses the fastest in the correct uniform once they are told which season it is wins.
Ok, that is what I got thus far.  What say you?

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